Self-Reflection (Ramblings) During Lockdown

Friday, May 08, 2020

I included a photo of my cat Rosie because she just depicts my mood completely
Hello my loves!

So much for all the self-reflection in my last blog post; fast forward six months and I still haven't posted anything on this little space of mine. Okay, prepare yourself for... more of my online self-reflection. Will anything be different this time round? I can't say for certain but I definitely think so! There's no excuses for not doing something you promised you would, but can you forgive me (again)? This time I prepared myself and actually planned some blog posts beforehand so I have some material ready to be published in case I'm just not 'feeling it'.

Writing is like a comfort blanket to me and without it I just don't function well. Not writing paired with not enjoying my current job and having a busy schedule, you can imagine, doesn't bode well. I think my being absent all boils down to being unhappy for quite some time. It's almost as if it wasn't me that was living my life but rather a shadow of me. Getting a bit of a breather from everything has been a blessing for me (of course I wish it was under less horrible circumstances). 

The lockdown has really made me take a step back from everything and it just confirmed that I can't go on pretending to be happy anymore. I need to start thinking of myself rather than of others and I need to start taking risks. Okay, I won't be moving to the other side of the world any time soon but I mean small risks such as publishing something I wrote even if I feel anxious about it. Anxiety has really overtaken my life in the past year but the mistake I made is that instead of fighting it, I just let it consume me further. Going forward, I really need to work on my mental health because sometimes one can forget how fragile it can be. I will need to make some changes in my work life as well as personal life no matter how nerve-racking it may be.

Alright, enough of all this gloomy rambling. It's time to share some positive thoughts with you! Lately, I found myself with more free time on my hands since I've been furloughed and I have dedicated that time to reading. This year will be the year in which I finally reach my Goodreads reading goal and I'm ecstatic. The big news is... I made a bookstagram account! It's really been amazing to share my love of books on Instagram and be a part of such a kind community. My heart feels warm just thinking about it! If you love books then I would love to connect with you - you can reach me on @libraryofsylvia. 

Now that I got a whole load of stuff off my chest I feel relieved and even more excited for what's to come on this platform. I hope that you will join me in this excitement and will come back to read some more of my rambling soon!

How would you feel about reading some book reviews and mental health related posts?

Lots of Love,
Sylvia

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